FRIED COFFEE

According to Clyde Eubornio Cox , Chief of Bacteriological Monitoring – Public Health Sector, mandatory DNA testing is set to become a law affecting all Chefs and cooks in the United States on May 1, 2009.

The new law is in response to growing concerns by consumers and nutritionists regarding the possible spread of gene mutations through food handling by unregulated kitchen workers leading to severe bouts of irascibility and general malaise.

According to Cox the stress and demands placed on Chefs as supervisors makes them particularly vulnerable to gene mutations affecting their demeanor and tolerance levels.

Dr. Cox, a recognized authority in the study of disapprobation and genetic causal linkages, first noticed this phenomenon while watching a re-run episode of “The Restaurant”. After observing the ranting and raving of Rocco DeSpirito, Cox instituted a crash program of research. Subsequent findings by the purple ribbon panel resulted in the new legislation.

” If we can curtail the spread of this insidious infestation while it’s in the early stages we believe the entire food service industry in the United States, perhaps , even the world will benefit from a gentler Chef environment” said Dr. Cox